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[穿越架空] 【异界九州】（20-21）终收母姐

皮卡丘十

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1楼 大 中 小 发表于 2021-4-20 23:02  显示全部帖子
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2楼老兄的回复很符合我的建议，对话流过于意识话和情绪化，有些许突兀，不利于读者了解内容。
建议添加更多的背景描述，利于过渡
本帖最近评分记录
  • 逍遥夢 金币 +3 认真回复，奖励！ 2021-4-21 10:29

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